Improve Interpersonal Skills with Stephan Wiedner

Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts or Spotify

A few years ago, I was at an event, meeting new people (as one does at those sorts of things, and as is my tendency). I was being vague when explaining what I do… 

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Sidebar to own this because I know I’m not the only one who experiences this. 

Once I get beyond who I work with and the high-level “boutique consulting and coaching company,” I often struggle to be concise and clear with the specifics of the work. 

Some of this comes from too much influence from marketers/courses/mentors who drill in the idea of an “elevator pitch” – in a specific way, for a specific audience. (Noting there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But, for those of us who are neurodivergent, it can be a struggle to remember or be consistent with, which opens up a whole other can of worms and behaviours.) 

Some of this comes from not wanting to bore people with what I think is fun or interesting about the work I do but may not be of any interest to them. Like it is for so many of us, these things are often a work in progress. 

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Now, back to the event… 

So, there I am being too vague with my explanations, and the person I was speaking to kept asking me questions with a look on her face of interest, and also possibly confusion, distaste, or something not as reassuring as interest. After a few minutes, she pauses the conversation and says something along the lines of, “It sounds like a lot of what you do comes down to helping people manage interpersonal dynamics and get better outcomes from the interactions they have.” 

🤯

In other words, I often help people recognize how they (we) do things matters just as much as what they (we) do. 

I get very excited by this idea because I have always believed the skills associated with the how are more important than they are often recognized or given credit for. We tend to categorize those skills as “soft skills” which is an outdated misnomer that gives no credit to the impact or importance of the behaviours associated with them. 

Enter this week’s guest, Stephan Wiedner, the idea of “interpersonal skills,” and having the ability to measure and assess these behaviours, allowing us to interact with and lead others in more productive ways.

(Note to my future self: write a blog post around productive and destructive conversations and the behaviours associated with each of those.)

Stephan and his team at skillsetter.com are on a mission to help leaders be their best and to make the intangible tangible so companies can measure the impact of their L&D training and spending.

In this episode, we cover:

- How folks in helper professions and leaders/execs are similar

- What psychological safety is and how to create more of it

- How to assess your interpersonal skills and what to do with the results

- The one thing most leaders really struggle with (and a 3-step strategy to help)

Plus, a quick win/takeaway and so much more. 

If you’re a leader who can say, I wish I was better at _____” this conversation is for you.

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Stephan Wiedner is an entrepreneur whose mission is to abolish apathy in the workplace. He firmly believes that for great work to take place, everyone needs to have the courage to speak up and the confidence to know they’ll be heard. His passion for unleashing the collective potential of people has led him to cofound Noomii.com, the web’s largest network of independent life coaches and Skillsetter.com, a platform similar to a flight simulator for interpersonal skills. As someone who is immersed in the world of amorphous concepts such as culture, human performance, and soft skills, he is obsessed with making the intangible tangible so companies can measure the impact of their L&D spending.

Stephan has been a guest speaker for Truth, Lies, and Workplace Culture Podcast, Scrum Master Toolbox Podcast, Building Psychological Strength Podcast, and many other audiences interested in psychology, business, and technology. His writing has been featured in Forbes, Entrepreneur, and other popular publications.

In addition to his professional career work, Stephan serves as a volunteer firefighter in his local community. Stephan is married with two children and enjoys spending quality time in the outdoors, hiking, biking, camping, and reading.

Learn more at skillsetter.com and/or connect with Stephan on LinkedIn (@swiedner).