Managing Conflict in the Workplace with Diana Peterson-More

Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts or Spotify

For those of you who pay attention to these things, you may have noticed that the podcast episode was published last week, however, there was no accompanying newsletter or long-form blog post (released at that time). I’m not sure anyone (aside from me and, maybe, my podcast producer extraordinaire) is all that fussed about the mismatched timing, but it’s something that had me pause and consider whether or not to put off publishing the podcast another week.

And then, I put everything in the context I use with clients all the time: This isn’t a life or death situation. There are no consequences for not having these things go out/be published at the same time that are dire, or irreversible, in any way.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the last 10+ years of coaching and training, it’s that it’s always easier to be the one doling out the observations or advice than it is to be the one seeing the same damn thing in your own life!

As a former colleague of mine used to say all the time, “You can’t read the label from inside the bottle.”

If there is one thing I’m certain of in this life, it is the veracity of that statement.

If we think of the bottle as our perception and experience of reality, which includes HOW we think about things and all the information processing/context/history/etc that goes into our opinions, ideas, conversations, and otherwise, most of us struggle–sometimes greatly–to see or understand anything outside the bottle, let alone the label on it.

One of the places most often negatively impacted by that lack of ability to see outside is communication. We all struggle to understand how other people communicate and to properly interpret their message and intention, as well as intentionally communicate in ways that will land and have the impact we hope to have on other people. More often than not, we communicate with people the way that WE want to be communicated with–which is based on all the stuff that is inside our bottle, to begin with.

And, as it turns out, that is not a good way to make sure people hear what we want them to hear or to have the impact that we want to have.

Go. Figure.

Instead, we have to be constantly focused on how other people receive information, how they like to be communicated with, and ensure we are confirming they have heard what we wanted them to hear (that they are walking away from the conversation with what we hoped they would walk away with).

I often ask people around me what their intention is in communicating the thing they want to communicate (this comes up with feedback all the time). And, if they aren’t sure or they want to “make a point”, I encourage them to get clear and specific on their intentions before any sort of conversation. Because, ultimately, if the person we are communicating with doesn’t understand what we want them to understand, what is the point of communicating?

In this episode of the podcast, we are talking to bestselling author and leadership consultant, Diana Peterson-More about effectively managing conflict in the workplace and communicating with your team (in a way they’ll receive and understand).

Tune into our whole conversation for some great examples, a discussion about how social media has changed things, the difference between managing conflict and resolving it, what most adults’ greatest fear actually is–and so much more!

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Bestselling author, Diana Peterson-More, a former practicing employment lawyer & HR head, left a Fortune 50 to launch The Organizational Effectiveness Group. Her company focuses on people strategies & organizational systems to support strategic workplace goals. Services and products include custom-designed training, team and individual coaching and strategic planning. She also conducts investigations and serves as an expert witness.

Peterson-More is a blogger, guest columnist, and a conference presenter. She has been featured in CEO Magazine, ATD, TICE and HR.com online and print editions, and on leadership podcasts. Her first book, Consequential Communication in Turbulent Times: a Practical Guide to Leadership, will soon be joined by her second book: Courageous Communication – A Return to Civility: “Can’t We All Just Get Along?” Peterson-More received a BA, from UCLA & JD, from Loyola Law School. Learn more at www.dianapetersonmore.com. You can also find her on LinkedIn and Twitter/X.